Second Childhood

This is a family photograph taken years ago on vacation. I am the dork in the center with the big hair. Here's a family that doesn't smile for the camera! We don't say "cheese," just eat it!

As years pass by I have started to realize that roles get reversed and children become parents to their parents. I don’t think parents like it because they want to be your providers but things and equations change. I am a second child and I have always been very close to my father. I am very attached to both my parents and my sisters. Sometimes I have to remind myself that my life is with K!

Yesterday at work I get an SMS from my sister, who lives in Bombay, to check my email. So I check my yahoo account to read that she wants me to scold my father for doing something rather childish and irresponsible. Of course it wasn’t anything serious but you know how daughters can be. She also said that she cannot do it but since I can get away with a lot of things with him, why don’t I call him up and scold him? My older sister has been very close to my mother compared to me and of course I have been closer to my father compared to the other two. So of course I go home for lunch and call my sister up to ask what actually happened. She tells me and it amuses me to no end as it is indeed true that old age is nothing but second childhood!

So I call my parents up and my father fortunately picks up the phone. I start talking to him and instead of scolding him….start crying and tell him how hurt I am that he doesn’t take care of his health. I told him that I constantly worry about his and mother’s wellbeing and this kind of irresponsible behavior is not helping me at all. He actually apologized to me and said, “Sai bai (his nickname; bai means woman in Marathi and is added to a woman’s name as a form of respect and also is a term of endearment) I am sorry but I promise you that I will be more responsible” etc. I hung up and called my sister and said that all is well! She started laughing when I told her what I did. I also realized that I am turning into my mother. Like her I have turned emotional blackmailing into an art form.

I have realized since the time I was a toddler that I could melt his heart with my tears….and it works every time! It worked with Sister Marcia in the kindergarten class as blogged here and it works now as well. This time however I felt very guilty about doing that. My conversations with my parents and siblings always amuse K because he shares a different relationship and dynamics with his own parents and siblings. When I told him in the evening what transpired, he started laughing, “Oh my God….you are so manipulative. Thank God this behavior doesn’t work on me.” (Yes, K that is true because I haven’t disclosed what behavior works on you! *Evil grin*) But this time the tears were genuine because I am worried about them and the fact that much as I would like to be there for them I cannot! I called them up again last night and again this afternoon during my lunch hour. Finally my mother told me, “Don’t call us….we will call you.” I guess when one’s own parents say this; it speaks volumes of one’s stalker-like behavior! They might not get a restraining order against me but most definitely might start screening my phone calls!

PS: I am so glad that they are not internet savvy and therefore don’t read my blog.